beliveau1 Posted October 26, 2006 Share Posted October 26, 2006 (edited) We have a topic on words that inspire you, so I figured why not start one on the best insults you've ever heard? So here goes...... 'if only you were half the man your mother was......' B) B) p.s. try to keep it as clean as possible????? Edited October 26, 2006 by beliveau1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BTH Posted October 26, 2006 Share Posted October 26, 2006 hehe... PS: stealing my thread, are we? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pierre the Great Posted October 26, 2006 Share Posted October 26, 2006 "I've been called worse things by better people" I use that one all the time. and if after a racial slur towards an immigrant or minority say to the person "they're more (enter country) then you will ever be." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beliveau1 Posted October 26, 2006 Author Share Posted October 26, 2006 hehe... PS: stealing my thread, are we? Naaaah - just thought I'd take one in the opposite direction? Kind of a the good, the bad & the Ugly spinoff...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dark_faerie87 Posted October 26, 2006 Share Posted October 26, 2006 You're ugly and your mother dresses you funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Posted October 26, 2006 Share Posted October 26, 2006 Jerk store. Thread over. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobRock Posted October 26, 2006 Share Posted October 26, 2006 If I had a dog with a face like yours, I'd shave its ass and teach it to walk backwards. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shu Posted October 27, 2006 Share Posted October 27, 2006 Your ugly.............................. whats he gonna say back "im not ugly.........or NO im not.............................. he's just gonna sound stupid Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ch_nl Posted October 27, 2006 Share Posted October 27, 2006 Im rubber you are glue. Whatever you say to me bounces back a sticks to you. (Still looking for the ultimate insult) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beliveau1 Posted October 27, 2006 Author Share Posted October 27, 2006 Here are three that I've come across recently: 'Whatever is eating you - it must be suffering horribly.' 'When I look into your eyes, I see the back of your head.' 'There are only two things I don't like about her - her face!' And this is one we used to use in hockey - best if you use it just after you've wailed on some shmo and you're holding him down..... 'It's okay - you can get up off your knees now..... I know when I've been licked.' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athlétique.Canadien Posted October 27, 2006 Share Posted October 27, 2006 Tell someone in a deadend job who has pissed you off... "Is this what you are doing with your degree?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PMAC Posted October 27, 2006 Share Posted October 27, 2006 The all time best insults were IMHO from Winston Churchill Woman: Sir, If you were my husband, I would feed you poison. Churchill: Madam, if you were my wife I would take it And (also attributed to WC Fields) Man: you are a disgusting drunk Response: That's fine. Tomorrow, I'll be sober and you'll still be ugly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
habs_in_the_blood Posted October 27, 2006 Share Posted October 27, 2006 The all time best insults were IMHO from Winston Churchill Woman: Sir, If you were my husband, I would feed you poison. Churchill: Madam, if you were my wife I would take it And (also attributed to WC Fields) Man: you are a disgusting drunk Response: That's fine. Tomorrow, I'll be sober and you'll still be ugly. who is this Winston Churchill???? you left me hanging wanting more!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zowpeb Posted October 27, 2006 Share Posted October 27, 2006 Best insult/comeback line ever: "If I wanted any come back from you I'd scrape your throat." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quebecois Posted October 27, 2006 Share Posted October 27, 2006 Jerk store. Thread over. Oh yeah? Well i just had sex with your wife! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dark_faerie87 Posted October 27, 2006 Share Posted October 27, 2006 One word: 1967 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Posted October 27, 2006 Share Posted October 27, 2006 Oh yeah? Well i just had sex with your wife! My wife is in a coma B) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colin Posted October 27, 2006 Share Posted October 27, 2006 Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries. I fart in your general direction. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CoRvInA Posted October 27, 2006 Share Posted October 27, 2006 (edited) ok spanish insults we hear daily and also we tell good friends... (not for the faint of heart) "Me cago en la concha de tu madre or la perra que te pario" (I crap on your mother's ###### or the bitch that gave birth to you)... which is equivalent to "Hey ###### off" or "###### you" "Que pinga te pasa por el culo" (What cock is in your ass now?) which is equivalent to "what's the ###### the matter with you?" I'll think of moree Edited October 27, 2006 by CoRvInA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dutch_Habs_Fan Posted October 28, 2006 Share Posted October 28, 2006 Haha i love those George comments! Seinfeld lines are always suitable! There is always a good line in any situation Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shu Posted October 28, 2006 Share Posted October 28, 2006 who is this Winston Churchill???? you left me hanging wanting more!! He was a British Priminister before world war two and a while after. Basic History Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozhab Posted October 28, 2006 Share Posted October 28, 2006 ok spanish insults we hear daily and also we tell good friends... (not for the faint of heart) Definitely not for the faint hearted, nor a 7:30 timeslot. I love non-English insults. My favourite was taught to me by my (Yugoslav) Macedonian boss: 'idiu pichku mater' which means 'go back to your mother's c**t' Really nasty stuff for them. To pronounce it properly, you need to really spit out the 'pichku', thus adding to the dramatic effect. Just don't call them Greek... A couple of faves for ugly people: Face like a bulldog chewing on a wasp... Had a head like a bucket full of smashed crabs... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shortcat1 Posted October 29, 2006 Share Posted October 29, 2006 one I really like I read on a joke email. a policeman stops a woman for speeding and she says to him "I heard that the police doesn't give tickets to beautiful women... is that true?" The policeman responds "Yes, in fact that is true... sign the ticket here." Go :hlogo: Go! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MAK Posted October 29, 2006 Share Posted October 29, 2006 (edited) ok spanish insults we hear daily and also we tell good friends... (not for the faint of heart) "Me cago en la concha de tu madre or la perra que te pario" (I crap on your mother's ###### or the bitch that gave birth to you)... which is equivalent to "Hey ###### off" or "###### you" "Que pinga te pasa por el culo" (What cock is in your ass now?) which is equivalent to "what's the ###### the matter with you?" I'll think of moree andate en la concha de tu madre Edited October 29, 2006 by marky_and_komi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobRock Posted October 29, 2006 Share Posted October 29, 2006 Not really meant as an insult, but you could use it that way. A reporter once described former Flame Tim Hunter as a guy who looked like he ran the 100-yd dash in a 90-yd gym. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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